Guys Beware of Being Just a Friend

Most women can get sex anywhere, any time and any way they want it. The problem for us guys is that women don't want sex anywhere, any time and any way we want it. For women, sex comes bundled up with an onslaught of dizzying and complicated emotions. The result? It's infinitely easier for women to place men into the category of friends rather than admit them as lovers.

In fact, for a woman, a male friend is the best of both worlds: She can reap all the benefits of having a man around (strength, decision-making, solid advice, logic, common sense, and so on) without the hormone-based entanglements that sex brings to the table.

But men are different. Since we aren't saddled with psychologically crippling emotions, we aren't burdened with the senselessness of separating friendship from sex. In fact, for us, it's just the opposite: When a man likes a woman, he naturally wants to express his feelings between the sheets. This is natural.

Unfortunately, the female brain can't process this logic. Instead, it quickly either-ors any guy it encounters: Either he's going to be a lover or he's going to be a friend. And once a woman has relegated you to the Friend Zone, it's all but impossible for her to see you in any other way. Of course, she'll still expect you to act like the lovers she's currently sex-ploiting -- by forcing you to pay for her meals and cart her around like a chauffeur -- but without the fringe benefit of doing the horizontal hula.

Many guys fantasize that, by acting as a hot girl's friend or romantic counselor, they can backdoor it into her heart or her bed. This may work well in romantic comedies (or possibly with psychotic women), but in real life, you're just kidding yourself. You're a friend, and she doesn't need you for sex.

So how do you know if you're in the Friend Zone? Here are a few tip-offs.

you're just a friend if

You hear phrases like: I can talk to you about anything, You're really a nice guy, You're like a brother to me, You're my best friend, and You understand me."
You finally work up the courage to ask her out and she tells you: I don't want to jeopardize our friendship, I like you too much to go out with you, I don't want to risk losing what we have, and so on.
She tells you all about her problems with men.
She asks you for advice about the men she's attracted to.
She tells you excitedly, I just met this really great guy!

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